"glass slippers, green silks, and silver shoes". GP

my lips were chapped when Stel left me. I was sick and she took up so much space in the bed that it annoyed me. the next day I went to the cuntvaginasnatch next to Bob's house and bought two kinds of heavy duty lip stuff. I still have both of them. the Vaseline intensive care has been chewed by the monsters, but I still have it. my lips are chapped now and when I applied it to the cracks, she melted into me with the lip goo. I miss her so intensely and its weird how it surfaces.
     im on the sofa. levi is scared and licking my face because the tears worry him. I cant sleep in my bedroom tonight because I have stretched myself too thin with too many jobs and its wrecked. the whole house is disgusting, but today when Levi stood over top of me with the chunky soup can in his mouth three day old soup dripped out and fell on me. also, as I was getting ready to go to the bar with my friends, I noticed there was dog puke. I didn't clean it up. I did my hair instead, and put on a fat hiding dress and some high heels and went out. I looked pretty good and some guy says to me as I was leaving the bar " you got a bounce in your step" I did. for a minute. but I couldn't stay. I know that I had to have responsibility. I know that I needed to be out. but what would out bring? another country song of misery and stupid beer and the big balled guy talking to me resulting in me being so happy that someone considered me worthy that I thought he was a good choice?
   whats the better choice? coming back home to do the chores? im not really doing them. im drinking whiskey and typing this blog. I washed my face and put on my hippy squalene producing eye cream and came down stairs. I looked in the mirror and the lines in my forehead glistened with hippy cream, making the wrinkles the FIRST thing I saw when I looked in the mirror. I don't wear glass slippers, not anymore. its time to get the broom out and maybe the sewing machine. lord knows I already speak to the mice. or at least try to, Lucy was out when I came home tonight. 2 days inside was enough. I miss stella. I miss her so much that I am lost. stella would have stood up to the evil step mother for me, she would have written a song about the trimmins. oh well.
    at the show tonight I was cold so I tried to put all of my limbs on all of my limbs for warmth which led me to the belly. I held it in my hand and the hatred built up. my brother tells me its recumbent. I guess that's the word. i'll probably have to stop drinking to get rid of it.
   I don't know if I should post this at all. but I guess I will because I don't have my broom in hand and because the glass slippers fit me when I was 30.